Glenn Beck

A Helpful Lesson From Glenn Beck On Nicki Minaj And The Importance Of Keeping Kosher

It has been a few months since Glenn Beck went off on one of his trademark tangents in which he attempts to deliver some important lesson but merely ends up rambling rather incoherently.

On his television broadcast last night, Beck grew increasingly manic during his opening monologue as he tried to explain to his audience his utter horror over the new Nicki Minaj video which features lots of Nazi-like imagery.

Saying that the video is "the most degrading thing I have seen," Beck then sought to explain that this video was somehow a violation of the Torah's requirement to keep kosher because it was mixing "graphic, awful sex with the images of death."

God commands Jews to keep kosher, Beck explained, because "milk is life" and "meat is death" and so "you don't put life and death together." And that is exactly what Nicki Minaj did in her video, Beck said, which is why, when you see it, "every warning bell in you goes off."

"That's not keeping kosher," he said. "You're mixing life and death. You put those two together, it is the height of evil, okay? That's what God is trying to tell us with keeping kosher. That's sacred! Creating life is sacred. Death, not good! Don't put those two together. Well, that's what happened. When you see that video, that's exactly what happened":

Glenn Beck: Hillary Clinton Faked Her Concussion, But How Dare Anyone Question My Illness!

Glenn Beck ran an hour-long commercial-free broadcast of his television program Monday night so that he could tell his audience about a series of health problem that he has been battling for the last several years. Recounting everything from seizures and inexplicable pain to vision problems and vocal chord paralysis, Beck revealed that, at one point, doctors informed him that he probably had no more than five years left before he was completely incapacitated by various medical problems. Eventually Beck announced that thanks to changes in diet, lifestyle changes, and therapy from the doctors at the Carrick Brain Center in Dallas, he has largely overcome those problems.

In response to Beck's revelations, some medical experts came forward to say that Beck's diagnosis and the treatment he has been receiving were nothing but pseudo-scientific quackery.  Beck, in turn, took to Facebook last night to say that he can't believe that people could be so "nasty" as to assert that his medical issues were fake, saying that anyone who would say such a thing is obviously just a sad and lonely person who is out to pick a fight:

Just a note before I go to bed. A couple of thoughts.

I am reading the go giver. It is great! A must read for anyone that wants to change the world.

Also, I have read some pretty nasty things about how I am faking my illness. Yep. That's me. I am making it all up. So incredible. Anyway, I just want you to know that soon, I will not be holding my sweet wife back from answering these posts herself. You don't want a piece of her, because she is about to give it to you. . Of course, I might just be making her up as well. Maybe I am not even married, I am just saying I am to sell gold rings.

I love it when The Lord gives me the wisdom and peace to just laugh at how people treat us. Even better is when he also couples it with real empathy.

I first laugh and then wonder how dark and lonely their life must be that they really believe that people are that evil that they would actually live this big of a lie over multiple years. Then it hits you. How lonely they must be that they want and need to pick fights just to have someone notice them.

It is sad.

Indeed.

Anyone else remember Beck saying last year that the health issues then impacting Hillary Clinton and Teresa Heinz Kerry were probably government cover-ups?

Yesterday, Teresa Heinz Kerry, wife of Secretary of State John Kerry, was rushed to this hospital after apparently suffering from some sort of seizure ... but Glenn Beck isn't buying it because he just doesn't trust anything that the government says, which is why he suspects that the entire thing was orchestrated as a distraction from the "huge scandal" that Secretary Kerry was on his boat while a military coup took place in Egypt last week.

While it may be true that Heinz Kerry (or, as Beck called her, "Mrs. Ketchup") did end up in the hospital, Beck "can't give you any sympathy now because you've lied to us too many times" ... just as when former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton was hospitalized with a blood clot last year in an effort to cover-up Benghazi.

Though Clinton's blood clot was tied to a concussion she received after she fainted while suffering from the flu, Beck said "if she really had some weird thing in the hospital, then it should prohibit her from ever becoming president.

"She shouldn't be President of the United States if she going into the hospital for some sort of heart condition or brain condition or whatever she was in the hospital for," Beck said, "or was that just a scam so that we didn't talk about [Benghazi]"?

Five Conservatives Who Don't Understand Net Neutrality…But Are Definitely Against It!

On Monday, President Obama publicly urged the Federal Communications Commission to adopt strong rules preserving net neutrality, the principle that internet service providers must treat all data equally.

Obama’s comments placed a previously fairly niche technical issue right into the middle of the national political debate, forcing commentators to take a side on something many of them did not seem to understand. But luckily, many conservative politicians and pundits have an easy way of deciding where to stand on an issue: if Obama is for it, it will destroy America and they are against it!

1. Ted Cruz

Sen. Ted Cruz got the right-wing net neutrality pile-on started with a tweet calling the proposal “Obamacare for the Internet."

It didn’t really make sense, but as Matt Yglesias notes, that wasn’t the point: “What, if anything, that phrase means is difficult to say. But its political significance is easy to grasp. All true conservatives hate Obamacare, so if net neutrality is Obamacare for the internet, all true conservatives should rally against it.”

2. Bryan Fischer

As soon as Cruz spoke out, his far-right acolytes seem to have felt obligated to follow. On his radio program on Monday, the American Family Association’s Bryan Fischer struggled to grasp the proposal that he was definitely against, claiming that it would ban internet providers from charging customers more for faster service — something that already happens and that has nothing to do with net neutrality.

3. Glenn Beck

Glenn Beck is outraged that President Obama wants to end “the freedom of the internet” and ruin something that’s “working pretty well” because “the government is not involved in it at all.” Apparently unaware that current FCC regulations allow his online network, The Blaze, to stream on an open internet, Beck claimed that regulations preserving net neutrality would end this supposedly government-free system in which he operates his business.

Beck’s cohost Pat Gray accidentally debunked his own point by comparing Internet regulation to the interstate highway system, which he seems to also think remains open and accessible because it’s free from government interference.

4. FreedomWorks

The Tea Party group FreedomWorks got into the game yesterday with a video “clearing up” net neutrality for its supporters.

As Consumerist explains, FreedomWorks’ net neutrality explanation is basically a work of fiction:

“Supporters of the plan call it a [uses finger quotes] ‘free and open Internet’ but in reality it’s anything but,” says Somberg. “What net neutrality does is force providers to treat all Web content equally — the same speeds, the same prices, the same access.”

This is simply untrue.

Net neutrality merely says that ISPs can’t slow down, block, or prioritize any content. It doesn’t mean that everything gets treated with the same speed — just that an ISP does nothing to impede or boost any particular content company’s speed. So if it’s fast coming in from the company, it should be fast going out to the end-user. And if the host is slow, then it remains slow.

5. Alex Jones

Conspiracy theorist Alex Jones added his own special twist to the net neutrality debate, claiming that it is a “high tech version of what the Soviets and the Nazis and the Chinese Communists and Fidel Castro and every other nut ball did.” 

Bonus: David Barton

While net neutrality might have just recently crossed the radar of many right-wing commentators, make-believe historian David Barton has been beating the anti-net-neutrality drum for years. In 2011, Barton called net neutrality “socialism on the internet” and “redistribution of wealth through the internet” and insisted that it is "wicked stuff" that goes against the dictates of the Bible and the Founding Fathers.

This launched Barton into a discourse on the concept of “fairness,” which he said “is a word no Christian should ever use in their vocabulary” because “what happened to Jesus wasn’t fair.”

Right Wing Bonus Tracks - 11/13/14

  • Jerry Boykin calls upon military leaders to inform President Obama that "I can no longer support your ill-advised and reckless policies that I regard as threats to national security and the welfare of our men and women in uniform" and resign in protest.
  • Focus on the Family's Glenn Stanton has a new book out entitled "Loving My (LGBT) Neighbor."
  • Tim Brown says that "the reason people can’t take bisexuality seriously is because it is a mental illness that needs to be corrected via repentance, not coddled like a three-year-old. The same thing applies with homosexuals. They are not taken as a legitimate lifestyle choice by the world’s population because it is unnatural."
  • Peter LaBarbera believes that "the government should be taking steps to discourage men and boys from practicing homosexual behavior."
  • Finally, Glenn Beck will be releasing his first feature film next year and it is about a warrior Santa Clause tasked with protecting Jesus Christ. We really are at a loss for words:

Beck: 'Revolutionaries Will Come And They Will Pull You Out Of Your Car And Shoot You'

We didn't think such a thing was possible, but Glenn Beck's warnings about net neutrality have become even more bizarre when, on his radio program today, he said that an incident in which activists confronted FCC Chairman Tom Wheeler on the issue earlier this week is a sign that "revolutionaries" would soon begin pulling people out of their cars and offices and murdering them in the streets.

After playing a short clip from a video showing net neutrality activists blocking Wheeler's car as he tried to leave for work on Monday, Beck beseeched the country to heed his warning that revolution is coming.

"I am begging America to listen to me," Beck said. "Please listen to me. You are dealing with revolutionaries ... Revolutionaries will come and they will pull you out of your car and shoot you. They will pull out of your office, your bank, they will pull you out of your plush political office, they will pull you out of your anchor chair, they will pull you out of wherever you are when they decide revolution is here and you've betrayed the revolution."

"This is a harbinger," he warned. "Wake up. Wake up. They're playing by different rules. They're not playing by all the rules you think they are. Wake up. Please, dear God, wake up before it's too late":

Watch Glenn Beck Unknowingly Make The Case For Net Neutrality While Arguing Against It

For over five years now, Glenn Beck has publicly opposed net neutrality due, in large part, to his own complete misunderstanding of what net neutrality actually seeks to ensure:

Network neutrality is the idea that [internet service providers] should treat all internet traffic equally. It says your ISP shouldn’t be allowed to block or degrade access to certain websites or services, nor should it be allowed to set aside a "fast lane" that allows content favored by the ISP to load more quickly than the rest.

On his radio broadcast today, Beck delivered a truly amazing diatribe against net neutrality during which he ironically made the case for net neutrality without even realizing it, mainly because he has no idea what he is talking about.

"Net neutrality is the global warming of the internet," Beck asserted, falsely claiming that the government is seeking to regulate the internet which, he claims, will ruin "the freedom of the internet."

Beck's view is entirely backwards, as net neutrality actually seeks to preserve the open and free internet that he was praising, so it was only natural that Beck then launched into a passionate attack on net neutrality by claiming that it would allow the government to shut down voices that it doesn't like.

Beck's own The Blaze network relies heavily upon the open and free internet that net neutrality seeks to preserve, but Beck apparently doesn't realize that and so he spent an entire segment arguing against it by claiming that internet service providers can seek to shut down his network by slowing down access to the content he produces, thereby making it more difficult for consumers to access.

Under current FCC regulations, such actions are prohibited and the entire purpose of net neutrality is to permanently prevent exactly that sort of thing from becoming legal. As such, one would think that Beck would support it ...  but no.

Why?

"Because the government is only going to protect those who are playing ball with the government," Beck claimed.

Things got even more bizarre when co-host Pat Gray weighed in, demanding to know why the Obama administration was claiming that it wants to ensure that the internet remains free and accessible.

"It already is!" Gray said. "It can't get any more free and it can't get any more accessible that it is right now ... There's not a problem now, so don't create one."

Today's free and open and accessible internet is the very thing that net neutrality is designed to preserve, but apparently nobody on Beck's entire staff can understand that basic fact.

Paranoia-Rama: Obama's Murderous Endgame, New George Soros Conspiracy Theory, And Beware 'Sodomite Semen'

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

The GOP’s strong performance in this week’s elections hasn’t curbed far-right fears about the Obama presidency, and in fact, some fear that the president may now pursue extremely deadly policies. When not worrying about the government, conservatives are also suspicious about what gay people are doing to their coffee.

5) Obama Worse Than Stalin, Mao And Pol Pot

Rick Wiles has regularly warned that President Obama “will bring unspeakable violence and bloodshed to the soil of America” and even “destroy the country,” fearing that “every time there has been a dictator that has taken over a country, within a short period of time millions of people die and they are always Christians.”

This week, the “Trunews” host spoke to fellow End Times broadcaster Steve Quayle, who told Wiles that Obama will “supersede” violent dictators like Mao Zedong, Joseph Stalin and Pol Pot.

4) Obama ‘Will Punish The Nation’ For Voting Republican

Right-wing talk show host Laurie Roth is urging Republicans in Congress to see the 2014 election as a mandate to “defend against everything Obama has cursed and touched” and begin “undoing massive damage at the hands of Obama.”

Writing in BarbWire today, Roth cautioned that Obama will take his anger over the GOP victories out on American citizens.

“Now there is not enough medication for the leftist media and Democrat-Zombie survivors. Well…they can deal with it. We have had to deal with them for the last 6 years from hell,” she said. “It is time to celebrate, then be aware and plan for the next Zombie moves from Obama and the left. Obama is mad now, more than ever and he will punish the nation severely through his executive orders, starting with the amnesty middle finger.”

Fortunately, Roth said, God is on the GOP’s side: “Bring it God…America needs and wants you again. We are coming back. Put your sunglasses on world because America will soon be very bright again.”

3) George Soros Is Behind Obama … And Wants Obama To Fail

Glenn Beck believes George Soros is pulling the strings of political events around the world, and according to Beck, Soros had a secret meeting with Hillary Clinton where he told her to “back off” and deliberately lose to in the 2008 Democratic primary race.

Beck posits that Soros knew Obama’s “radical things” would “cause all kinds of strife,” enabling Clinton to “come in as the moderate” when Obama’s time in office is over. Then, as Beck’s theory goes, Clinton can implement the final steps of their radical left-wing agenda: “You will be the one that was remembered for picking up all of the pieces and having the final transformation, you will be the mother of the country where Washington was the father of the country and this guy [Obama] will be remembered as the mother-blank of the country.”

2) The Great Voter Fraud Bust

Fearing that Democrats would rig the election with widespread voter fraud, the Tea Party-aligned group True the Vote recently unveiled a smart phone app that “will finally pull the curtain back on the myth that there is no voter fraud.”

But this week the app proved once again that voter fraud is, in fact, a myth, as True the Vote posted a mere 18 submissions from app users in an election where over 83 million people turned out to vote. Of the 18, just one dealt with an actual issue of voter fraud (potential voter impersonation, an extremely rare occurrence).

Most of the app’s posts dealt with irregularities that have nothing to do with True the Vote’s political agenda of passing restrictive voter ID laws, and “one report to True the Vote’s app chronicled a voter’s struggle with an overly restrictive voting law that True the Vote supports.”

One True the Vote gumshoe reported that an “African American woman working there was standing behind me watching me vote.” And because of horrific events like this, True the Vote and other conservative groups have successfully convinced GOP-controlled legislatures around the country to pass laws cracking down on voting rights.

1) Sodomite Semen In Your Starbucks!

We knew anti-gay activists were no fans of Starbucks, but Harlem pastor James David Manning took their concerns to a whole new level in recent commentary on “The Manning Report.”

He managed to link a recent small protest outside of his church, where two people handed out Starbucks coffee, to “homosexual sodomite” Dr. Craig Spencer, the New York man who contracted Ebola in Guinea (and who has a girlfriend).

“Starbucks is a place where these types frequent and a lot of body fluids are exchanged there and Ebola,” Manning said, warning that Starbucks has been “taking specimens of male semen and they were putting it in the blends of their lattes.” He added: “My suspicion is that they’re getting their semen from sodomites. Somebody has discovered that semen like cord blood has millions of little zygotes in it and flavors up the coffee, and makes you thinks you’re having a good time.”

“This is the absolute truth,” he said, citing a satirical article.

Glenn Beck: Obama 'Would Have Been Impeached Years Ago' If Media Decided To 'Tell The Truth'

Glenn Beck attacked the media on his radio show today for their coverage of President Obama, arguing that the president would no longer be in office if the media “just started to tell the truth.”

The right-wing pundit was especially upset that the media didn’t embrace his 2009 campaign against Van Jones, whose short-lived White House post as an advisor on “green jobs” Beck thinks should have brought down the president.

“He wouldn’t be president, he would have been impeached years ago…if they would have been telling the truth the whole time, he would’ve been impeached,” Beck said. “Quite honestly, he would not have made it—if it was anyone else, he would not have made it through Van Jones.”

Glenn Beck Makes Hilarious Trans Jokes: I Might Lose My Winkie!

On his radio program today, Glenn Beck and his cohosts Stu Burguiere and Pat Gray chatted about men who see romantic films based on the works of author Nicholas Sparks, such as “The Notebook” and “A Walk to Remember.”

Relying on tired gender stereotypes, the trio ended up joking about how men who see more than three or four Sparks movies are probably questioning their gender — “and there’s nothing wrong with that” — with Beck joking that such men should put “iodine on the winkie” or “cut it off like butter knife.”

“We put iodine on your winkie,” Beck said. “We give you breast enhancements, we give you shots of estrogen.”

As the show went on, of course, it turned out that Beck had seen several Sparks movies himself: “I might be getting genitalia surgery, nothing wrong with that, and you should pay for it. And nothing wrong with that either; we should all have to pay for that.”

Watch the transphobia in action:

Right Wing Bonus Tracks - 11/6/14

  • Gov. Bobby Jindal will reportedly be hosting a David Lane-organized prayer rally in Louisiana in January, much like Gov. Rick Perry did in Texas in 2011.
  • Rick Joyner says "No President has been so resoundingly rebuked by the American people as was done with the Elections of 2014. The House now has its largest majority in history, and it is Republican." Neither of those claims are true.
  • Tony Perkins claims that "as conservatives, we aren’t looking for businesses to take our side." Oh, really?
  • James Robison is cautiously optimistic about the election results: "God has mercifully given us the opportunity to see our nation awaken and begin the healing process. The runaway train now known to be an out-of-control, excessive, secular progressive (basically socialistic) federal government has at least been slowed, but not yet brought under control."
  • It is 2014 and the Republicans have finally elected a black woman to serve in the House of Representatives, so naturally Glenn Beck sees that as proof that Martin Luther King's dream has finally come true. Way to go Republicans! Oh, by the way, the first black woman to serve in Congress was a Democrat and she was elected in 1968.

A Ninety-Year-Old Glenn Beck From The Future Will Explain That 2014 Was The Year Religious Freedom Was Lost

On his radio broadcast today, Glenn Beck mentioned that he is bringing in a Hollywood makeup artist tomorrow to make him up to look like a ninety-year-old man so that he can film a segment for his upcoming end-of-the-year special in which he recounts, in the year 2054, how 2014 was the year that religious freedom was lost forever.

As Beck explained, he'll be made up to appear as a decrepit and disheveled ninety-year-old man who lives alone in an abandoned warehouse in post-apocalyptic wasteland in which religion has been outlawed. Secreted away among his belongings, Beck revealed, will be a tattered copy of the Bible, which is now contraband and which merely possessing is enough to get him killed.

And it all began, future Beck will warn, when city officials in Houston, Texas, issued subpoenas to five local pastors in response to a lawsuit filed by anti-gay activists in an effort to overturn the city's nondiscrimination ordinance in 2014:

It Just Never Ends: Glenn Beck Warns That Lower Gas Prices Are 'Actually Not Good' For America

Glenn Beck has now reached the point where, literally no matter what is happening, it is a harbinger of gloom and chaos.

While, for the last several years, Beck has been absolutely certain that the Obama administration has been intentionally implementing energy policies designed to drive up oil and gas prices in order to collapse the system, today oil and gas prices are falling dramatically and the price of a gallon of gas is under $3.00 for the first time in four years.

While high gas prices were a dire threat to America, according to Beck, so too apparently are low gas prices, as he is now warning that "this is actually not good for the United States of America" because lower oil prices will lead to destabilization in places like Saudi Arabia and Russia, which will lead to war.

"When you destabilize the world even more, it causes more problems," Beck said, "and they will do what they have to do boost the prices around the world. We're not far from war as it is and the economy is in real trouble here. When you have people like Saudi Arabia, unscrupulous, and Russia, totally unscrupulous, and they want their money, they'll get  it":

Glenn Beck Reveals The Intricate George Soros Plot To Make Hillary Clinton The Next President

When he is not talking about how much he hates talking about politics, Glenn Beck spends a lot of time talking about politics; so much so that he spent the entire first hour of his radio program yesterday laying out a scenario through which expected Republican gains in today's election will result in Hillary Clinton becoming the next president in 2016.

As Beck envisions it, if Republicans take control of Congress, our political system will then become a showdown between President Obama, who will become increasingly radical, and the Republicans, which will allow Clinton to stake out the middle ground between the two and coast into the White House.

In fact, Beck said, he is pretty sure that this plan was all laid out in a secret meeting between Clinton, Obama, and George Soros way back in 2008.

Admitting that he has absolutely no evidence to back any of this up, Beck nonetheless spun out his theory about how Soros ordered the unions to back Obama in the Democratic primary as a message to Clinton to "back off" and get out of the way so that Obama could become president, at which point he would implement so many radical policies that he would transform the nation but also become wildly unpopular as a result.

That would then allow Clinton to run in 2016 by pretending to be a moderate who can save the nation, thereby allowing her to waltz into the White House and complete the total transformation of our country.

"You will be the mother of the country, where [George] Washington was the father of the country," Beck imagines Soros having told Clinton. "And [Obama] will be remembered as the mother-blank of the country."

"I believe a conversation like that is likely that it happened" he said:

Right Wing Bonus Tracks - 10/31/14

  • Glenn Beck insists that his "predictions are pretty accurate just never with the timing right," which is really just a cop-out way of saying that his wild claims can never be proven wrong because it is always possible that they just haven't happened yet.
  • Liberals are just like Dracula.
  • Todd Starnes is a proud six-day Creationist.
  • Obviously, this case of a reportedly Christian man beheading his friend for practicing witchcraft means we need to ban all Christians from immigrating to America, right Bryan Fischer?
  • Finally, FRC prays for the upcoming elections: "Lord, we have less than a week before Americans choose their nation’s political destiny. You know what all is at stake. Grant your Church heart-felt repentance at every level. Among the sins for which we must repent, help those who are called by your name to repent of our failure to love our neighbors and nation enough to diligently vote, and to vote for men and women who will uphold righteous and just laws. May believers everywhere pray and fast this week as they plan to cast their votes. Have mercy and redeem our nation, a nation you have blessed beyond any nation in history, but which has declined precipitously under our watch. Guide your people this Election Day and may our choices be pleasing to You."

Beck: Don't Join The Military Because 'We Have A Chance Of Losing Our Country In the Next Two To Three Years'

On his radio program today, Glenn Beck answered some questions submitted by his listeners, including one from a parent of a son who wants to join the ROTC, which the parent opposes because America's "leadership is so corrupt," asking Beck if he would allow his own son to join the military.

"I wouldn't want my son joining the military now," Beck declared, saying that no matter who becomes the next president, America is going to implode.

"Starting Tuesday, until the inauguration of the next president," he said, "this is the most dangerous time in our nation's history."

"All it's gonna take is a Black Swan event and I think we could be in deep, deep trouble," Beck warned. "We have a chance of losing our country in the next two to three years":

Glenn Beck's Co-Hosts See Nothing Wrong With Catcalling Video: 'You're Asking For Somebody To Notice Your Butt'

Earlier this week, an anti-street-harassment group released a video documenting a woman dressed in jeans and a t-shirt receiving over a hundred unwanted catcalls from men while walking the streets of New York over a ten hour period.

Glenn Beck mentioned the video on his radio program today, admitting that some of this harassment was creepy and inappropriate, but his co-hosts, Pat Gray and Stu Burguiere, were not particularly sympathetic, insisting that the vast majority of the remarks made toward this woman should be considered compliments and asserting that she obviously wanted people looking at her backside.

At one point in the video, a man says "Sexy American Eagle" as the woman passes by, apparently in reference to a logo patch on back of her jeans, and Pat Gray didn't really see anything wrong with that, asserting utterly without evidence that she must have had a large logo plastered across her behind, which was her way of enticing people to look at it.

"C'mon, you're wearing logos on your butt!" Gray said. "You're asking for somebody to notice your butt":

Five Crazy Conspiracy Theories About Ebola That Conservatives Actually Believe

As of today, there is only one person undergoing treatment for Ebola in the United States, and only two people have contracted the disease in the U.S., both of whom are healthcare workers who survived.

But the U.S.’s success in fighting the disease at home has not stopped Republican politicians and their allies in the conservative media from turning it into a political issue, warning of an impending massive Ebola outbreak in the U.S. and declaring that when that happens it will be all President Obama’s fault.

Here are five of the most common conspiracy theories that conservative commentators and their Republican allies are pushing about Ebola:

1. Obama Will Bring Ebola To The U.S. Through The Southern Border

Never mind the fact that the countries hit hardest by the Ebola outbreak are all in Africa. Or that there hasn’t been a single case of Ebola in Latin America, let alone among migrants crossing the southern border. Republican politicians aren’t going to waste a good opportunity to gin up vague, unfounded xenophobic fears by claiming that people infected with Ebola are about to cross the southern border. (That is, if they haven’t already!)

Rep. Phil Gingrey, R-Ga., said in July that he had heard “reports” of undocumented immigrants infected with the Ebola virus coming into the U.S. through the southern border. When asked about these “reports” by journalists, Gingrey admitted that they did not actually exist. Indiana GOP Rep. Todd Rokita similarly warned that undocumented minors from Central America could represent a threat “from a public-health standpoint, with Ebola circulating and everything else.”

This month, Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., warned conspiracy theorist Glenn Beck about the prospect of the Ebola virus jumping the southern border, and in another interview speculated that Obama’s policies may cause thousands of U.S. troops to contract Ebola.

Thom Tillis, the North Carolina House speaker challenging Democratic U.S. Sen. Kay Hagan, said his plan to deal with Ebola is “to seal the border and secure it,” while Sen. Pat Roberts, the Kansas Republican locked in a tight re-election race, cited Ebola as a major reason why “we have to secure the border and we cannot have amnesty.”

Mike Huckabee warned his Fox News audience that people with Ebola will begin to fly from West Africa to Mexico in order to sneak into the U.S.: “If someone with Ebola really wants to come to the U.S., just get to Mexico and walk right in."

Former Massachusetts Sen. Scott Brown, who is now running for Senate in New Hampshire, said that America’s “porous” southern border will let people with Ebola just “walk across it.” He later claimed that “if Mitt [Romney] was the president right now,” then he could “guarantee you we would not be worrying about Ebola right now.”

2. Obama Will Bring Ebola To The U.S . In Order To Impose Martial Law

Naturally, the White House “orchestrated” the Ebola epidemic in West Africa to justify its Big Government agenda, according to several conservative commentators and at least one actual member of Congress.

Rep. Steve Stockman, Republican of Texas, said this month that Obama has laid the groundwork to use “emergency powers to take over control of the economy and everything” and speculated that the president might intentionally slow the government response to Ebola in order to create a crisis situation that he could then exploit:

Their terminology is there’s always a crisis which they want to use to their benefit, I would not be surprised that the reason that you see a lack of response is so that it becomes a real crisis and things can be used to correct the crisis, you know. It’s just bizarre there’s not enough action up front and I’m wondering if that’s — I’m not saying this — but I’m wondering if that’s intentional in order to create a greater crisis to use it as a blunt force to say, well in order to solve this crisis we’re going to have to take control of the economy and individuals and so forth. I don’t know. It’s just a strange non-response, a strange way of handling it and I think that if it does go forward and we do not control it, there may be an overreaction where the government starts taking away the rights of those that aren’t that necessarily involved or need that to happen. I hope that’s not that case but as you know this current government uses crisis to advance their philosophy and their agenda.

Laurie Roth, a conservative talk show host, predicted that Obama would “create a guise to declare martial law due to created outbreaks” and introduce a fake Ebola vaccine that would “act as a tracker.”

Another radio broadcaster, Rick Wiles, feared that Obama would use Ebola to “round up patriots,” shutter churches and set up “re-education camps.”

The conspiracy theorists of WorldNetDaily are sounding similar themes.

Erik Rush, a columnist for the conservative media outlet, wondered if Obama administration officials actually “want Ebola to spread in the United States,” creating a crisis “orchestrated by the White House in order to ultimately ‘legitimize’ a declaration of martial law in America.”

Mychal Massie also took to WorldNetDaily to suggest that Obama will manufacture an Ebola crisis in order to achieve his goal of cancelling the 2016 elections and staying in office indefinitely.

WorldNetDaily’s Morgan Brittany claimed that the government is showing “no urgency to stop the disease from entering the U.S.,” which she said betrays the administration’s intention to make use of its non-existent FEMA coffins, declare martial law and seize guns.

“Questions were then brought up about the stockpiling of ammunition and weapons by Homeland Security over the past couple of years and the $1 billion worth of disposable FEMA coffins supposedly stored in Georgia. Why was there preparation being made for FEMA camps to house people in isolation?” Brittany wondered. “My fear is that this has all been orchestrated from the very beginning. Who knows? Maybe the current administration needs this to happen so martial law can be declared, guns can be seized and the populace can be controlled. Once that happens … game over.”

3. Obama Will Bring Ebola Outbreak To The U.S. To Help His ‘African Brothers’

Conservatives frequently insist that none of their criticism of Obama has anything to do with race, and more than a handful have claimed that the president’s handling of the Ebola outbreak proves that he is the real racist.

Conservative columnist and Judicial Watch founder Larry Klayman cited Obama’s response to the Ebola outbreak as proof that he favors “his African brothers, putting the interests of fellow blacks, with whom he feels a kinship, ahead of others.”

“Obama has favored his African brothers over the rest of us by allowing them free entry into this country,” Klayman wrote in another column. “As a result, Ebola has now been introduced into the United States, may be on the verge of spreading rapidly, with the end result being potential massive death to our citizenry.”

“Regrettably our Muslim commander in chief has favored his own creed over the rest of us,” he added.

Eagle Forum founder Phyllis Schlafly also claimed that Obama is “letting these diseased people into this country to infect our own people” in order to make the U.S. more like Africa.

“Obama doesn’t want America to believe that we’re exceptional,” she wrote. “He wants us to be just like everybody else, and if Africa is suffering from Ebola, we ought to join the group and be suffering from it, too. That’s his attitude.”

Rush Limbaugh argued that “leftist” elected officials believe that Ebola “is ultimately traced back to us; because of our slavery, we kind of deserve a little bit of this.”

Not to be outdone, Laura Ingraham maintained that Obama’s “familial connection to Africa” and “core ties to the African continent” are shaping the president’s response to Ebola to the detriment to the U.S.

4. Obama Will Bring Ebola Outbreak To The U.S. Because He Hates America

Public health experts have consistently said that knee-jerk reactions like stopping travel from West Africa and quarantining healthcare workers will do nothing to lessen the Ebola risk in America (and may in fact make it worse), and that the best way for the United States to protect itself from the disease is to help fight it at its source in Liberia, Sierra Leone and Guinea.

But we all know not to trust scientists!

Republican politicians and conservative commentators have expressed outrage that President Obama has put resources into fighting Ebola in West Africa and is ignoring their calls for counterproductive flight bans and quarantines. They remind us that the president is, after all, an anti-American radical so everything he does should be held in suspicion.

Fox News commentator Keith Ablow speculated this month that “the president may literally believe we should suffer along with less fortunate nations,” arguing that Obama wants Americans to experience an Ebola epidemic out of a sense of “fairness” since he thinks the American people have “been a scourge on the face of the Earth.”

“We don’t have a president who has the American people as his primary interest,” Ablow said. “We’re not even voting for somebody who likes us. This guy, who has names very similar to two of our archenemies, Osama, well, Obama. And Hussein. Hussein.”

The American Family Association's Bryan Fischer said recently that he was just asking the question whether Obama wants to “punish” America with Ebola: “It looks like he actually wants Ebola to come to the United States. Why would he want that? Well, remember President Obama thinks that this country is racist to its core, it’s been racist since the beginning, it’s an evil, colonial force that’s been the root of all kinds of evil all around the world, it needs to be punished, it needs to be brought down to size, it needs to be disciplined.”

Conservative talk show host Michael Savage suggested that Obama “wants to infect the nation with Ebola,” insisting that Obama’s handling of Ebola “rises to levels of treason, it actually exceeds any level of treason I’ve ever season.”

“Obama wants equality and he wants fairness and it’s only fair that America have a nice epidemic or two or three or four in order to really feel what it’s like to be in the Third World. You have to look at it from the point of view of a leftist,” he added.

Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-Texas, also posited that Obama and other Democratic officials say “don’t quarantine, let’s don’t close our borders” because they “feel like we want everyone to feel included” and “don’t want anybody to feel like they’re being left out.”

Glenn Beck speculated that Obama may be allowing the disease to take hold in conservative parts of the country, telling Fox News host Bill O’Reilly earlier this month that the president was ignoring the cases of two nurses who contracted Ebola in Dallas, perhaps because the city “doesn’t particularly care for the president.”

If this were happening in Washington, D.C., right now, do you think the President and his administration would be acting like this? Do you think the Congress would be acting like this? This is happening in Dallas, Texas, this is a top-ten city in the United States of America. Happens to be one that doesn’t particularly care for the president all that much and his policies, one that the president has not been too favorable on. We are already being squeezed on our southern border, now we’re being squeezed by Ebola. Is there an agenda here? Is that possibly the reason, because I can’t figure out any other reason.

5. Ebola Is God’s Judgment On America (Especially Obama)

Of course, several Religious Right figures are responding to the Ebola epidemic by suggesting that it is divine punishment on America.

The televangelist John Hagee said this month that Ebola is a sign of God’s disapproval of Obama’s foreign policy in the Mideast.

“Our president is dead-set on dividing Jerusalem. God is watching and he will bring America into judgment,” he said, and as a result “we are now experiencing the crisis of Ebola.”

Ron Baity, a North Carolina pastor who worked with the Family Research Council and other anti-gay groups to pass a marriage equality ban, blamed Ebola on the gay community.

“We are bringing the judgment of God on this nation,” Baity said. “As sure as Sodom and Gomorrah was destroyed, don’t be surprised at the plagues, don’t be surprised at the judgment of God. You think Ebola is bad now? Just wait.”

“Trunews” host Rick Wiles also linked Ebola to homosexuality, but had a slightly different view. As Wiles explained, “Ebola could solve America’s problems with atheism, homosexuality, sexual promiscuity, pornography and abortion.”

What A Difference A Year Makes In The Life Of Glenn Beck

The midterm elections are less than a week away and Glenn Beck has been noticeably disinterested, very rarely even discussing the key races or the election in general on his radio or television program in recent weeks.

Perhaps realizing that he should at least pretend to feign interest in the election, Beck hosted a "one day only comprehensive midterm coverage" episode on his radio program yesterday during which he interviewed a handful of Republican candidates while barely managing to conceal his utter boredom.

In the last week or so, Beck has repeatedly said that he hates politics and politicians and doesn't want to cover these issues any more because there is no difference between the two parties:

"Stop making it seem like there are two parties. There’s no Republicans or Democrats. There are progressives and non-progressives. There are those progressives, and then those who believe in the Constitution. I happen to believe in the Constitution. The progressive party was started by the Republicans. Period. And you’ll notice, you’ll notice as soon as I started saying that, you’ll notice how quickly the establishment started to run from me."

Beck's disinterest can be traced back to the loss of Tea Party challengers to Republican incumbents during the GOP primaries earlier this year, in which "founder-quality" candidates like Matt Bevin and Chris McDaniel failed in their efforts to unseat Republican senators Mitch McConnell and Thad Cochran, respectively ... and which Beck did not handle well.

Ever since then, Beck has soured on electoral politics, which is rather interesting since it seems to be diametrically opposed to the message that he was delivering just over a year ago when he told his audience not to give up on politics because they were just on the verge of completely taking over the Republican Party.

"I don't think people realize how close you are to winning," Beck said on his radio program last summer. "Don't you see, in six years we haven't been this close to taking over taking over the Republican Party ... The next election, you're there": 

Now, "the next election" is here ... and Glenn Beck is nowhere to be seen.  

Beck: 'We Are A Nation On A Suicide Course'

After having spent nearly all of last week growing increasingly freaked-out about the Ebola threat, Glenn Beck had toned down the nonstop coverage this week until the news broke last night that a doctor in New York City had tested positive for the virus after returning from treating patients in Guinea.

That news, coupled with reports of a hatchet-wielding man having attacked police in New York City and the shooting in Canada earlier this week, prompted Beck to fume on his radio broadcast today that President Obama simply does not care about keeping America safe from disease or from what he is now calling "psychotic Islam."

"How does he survive being this wrong on so many things?" Beck asked, without a hint of irony, concluding that our society has gotten to the point that America has become "an abomination" that is on the verge of suicide, which is why our young people are trying to join ISIS.

"Because we in the West don't stand for anything anymore, our children are bored" and have nothing to believe in, Beck said, which is why it should come as no surprise that "our children are actually going over and trying to join ISIS because they know we have built something that is a complete and total fraud ... What we have built is an abomination."

"We are a nation on a suicide course," Beck said later in the segment, warning that when America goes down, it will take the entire world with it.

"They always have said when America sneezes, the rest of the world gets a cold," he said. "Well what happens when America gets Ebola?"

'It's Despicable': Glenn Beck Says Girls In Anti-Sexism Video Have Been Scarred For Life

Yesterday, the organization FCKH8.com released a video featuring a bunch of young girls railing against inequality and sexism while dropping lots of F-bombs in the process and Glenn Beck is predictably outraged, calling the video "despicable" and saying that the parents who allowed their daughters to appear in the video have scarred them for life.

"No parent says to a six year-old girl, 'Hey, hey, hey, you can say this,'" Beck declared. "Go ahead. It's cool. Use the F-word. Drop the F-bomb a few times. Nobody says that. Nobody! Nobody who is a decent parent ever would say that."

"It's despicable," he continued. "This is going to scar them. This is setting their feet on a path, they have shaped these girls and taught these girls something that you will never be able to unteach them":

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