Glenn Beck

Right Wing Leftovers - 2/18/14

  • Apparently, some people actually believe that "Ayn Rand's libertarian hero John Galt was unintentionally modeled on Jesus Christ."
  • FRC's Ken Blackwell and Bob Morrison ask the reasonable question "What if Obama Is a Marxist?"
  • "Coach" Dave Daubenmire is really just becoming a parody of every right-wing stereotype.
  • Matt Barber says gay activists are using judges to pit "the government directly against Christians, against the free exercise of religion and against those who embrace marriage reality."
  • Finally, Glenn Beck delivers another one of his patented ultra-serious, incoherent, stream-of-consciousness monologues that makes no sense:

'Tell Me How You Fix A Network After That?'

A few weeks ago, Touré did a "Carnac the Magnificent" bit on MSNBC's "The Cycle" that Glenn Beck and his radio co-hosts, Pat Gray and Stu Burguiere declared to be "the worst TV bit ever." The bit was so bad, according to Beck and crew, that it was the sort of thing that literally destroys networks and was proof that the people involved were so desperate to hold on to their jobs that they didn't even have the courage to take a stand and refuse to embarrass themselves on national television.

"Tell me how you fix a network after that," Beck said of the MSNBC bit. "That network is worth nothing afterwards because you have to completely blow it up."

That was the position Beck, Grey, and Burguiere held on January 31, 2014 ... but that was before they learned that George Soros had reportedly been attacked by his ex-girlfriend; a story which has brought nothing but delight to Beck, so much so that last night's television broadcast featured this:

That is Gray dressed as Soros and Burgiere in drag as his ex-girlfriend being interviewed by Beck in a segment that was not at all embarrassingly painful to watch:

The good news is that this is not the sort of pathetic segment that will destroy Beck's network because, heck, if ten minutes of Beck playing with Wizard of Oz dolls can't do it, nothing can.

Glenn Beck Is Preparing For 'Success Beyond Our Wildest Imagination'

Glenn Beck has always been one for grandiose and narcissistic proclamations about the mind-blowing impact whatever he is working on at the moment will have upon humanity, such as last year when he was boldly declaring that his Independence Day show was "going to change the way we celebrate the Fourth of July" forever, even though it ended up being nothing more than a cloyingly maudlin stage show.

And he is at it again because, as he said the other day, God has big miracles planned for Beck's network; so much so that Beck has begun telling his wife to start planning for "success beyond our wild imagination" to come their way in the coming months.

"What is coming now is," Beck said today on his radio show, "I really believe, cultural changing. I think we are going to help change the culture." Hinting that the movie studios located on his property will soon be in production, Beck said he is not sure what is coming but "there's some things coming, I can feel it and it's going to be good, it's going to be really, really good":

Linda Harvey Blasts Glenn Beck For Speaking Out In Opposition To Russia's Anti-Gay Crackdown

Mission America's Linda Harvey has been a vocal supporter of Russia's anti-gay "propaganda" law from the very beginning and now she is going after Glenn Beck for criticizing the rise of anti-gay bigotry in Russia and declaring that he would stand with GLAAD in opposing it.

On a radio commentary earlier this week, Harvey said the Russian law was really pretty mild and restrained and that incidents of anti-gay violence are not reflective of the law or those who support it. And the fact that Beck feels the need to speak out against what it happening in Russia, Harvey said, is a sign that he is either "grossly uninformed or he's compromised" on this issue:

The victim posturing of the homosexual playbook claims that gangs of people are now regularly beating up homosexuals in Russia as a result of this law and a Russian celebrity was quoted with an insane comment, something about homosexuals being burned alive.

Now come on, nobody gives any credibility to statements like this, but if you listen to groups like GLAAD, the homosexual pressure group, they claim anyone who applauds the new anti-propaganda law would agree with such an idiotic statement.

It's terribly confused and even Glenn Beck jumped into the fray expressing outrage over this celebrity's comment and saying he stands with GLAAD, the group that is anti-Christian and anti-morality. Beck is either grossly uninformed or he's compromised on this issue. He would not be the first so-called conservative to buy into this horrendous movement even as it jeopardizes the health and future of many kids.

...

This is a distraction, like all the rest of this publicity, which takes the focus off the law, which is that homosexual promotion and public endorsement and school programs do have an influence on kids and it is a harmful one.

Life Inside The Glenn Beck Bubble

All day yesterday, Glenn Beck was worked up about some article that appeared on The Huffington Post entitled "The Uniting Principles Glenn Beck Should Have Talked About." He railed against the article on his radio broadcast and again during the monologue of last night's television show, repeatedly accusing The Huffington Post of having written the piece, apparently completely unaware that it was little more than a blog post written by a random user of The Huffington Post's "The Blog" forum.

Like many websites, The Huffington Post has dedicated a section of its website to hosting blogs written and maintained by anyone who signs up for an account. The section literally has thousands of users and The Huffington Post explicitly states that the views posted by users in no way reflect the views of the Huffington Post itself:

We are an Internet Service Provider, e.g., We are Not Responsible For and Do Not Necessarily Hold the Opinions Expressed by Our Content Contributors: Opinions and other statements expressed by users and third parties (e.g., bloggers) are theirs alone, not opinions of The Huffington Post. Content created by third parties is the sole responsibility of the third parties and its accuracy and completeness are not endorsed or guaranteed. You acknowledge that by providing you with the ability to view and distribute content through our site, The Huffington Post is not undertaking any obligation or liability relating to the content. The Huffington Post and its affiliates, successors, assigns, employees, agents, directors, officers and shareholders do not undertake or assume any duty to monitor our site for inappropriate or unlawful content. The Huffington Post and its affiliates, successors, assigns, employees, agents, directors, officers and shareholders assume no responsibility or liability which may arise from the content thereof, including, but not limited to, claims for defamation, libel, slander, infringement, invasion of privacy and publicity rights, obscenity, pornography, profanity, fraud, or misrepresentation. Notwithstanding the foregoing, The Huffington Post reserves the right to block or remove communications, postings or materials at any time in our sole discretion.

But apparently nobody at Beck's network understands this rather simple and common practice, because they spent yesterday's morning meeting collectively trying to figure out why "The Huffington Post" would write something like this, eventually concluding that progressives know that there is a massive backlash coming against them and so they are desperately trying to get on the side of the values and principles that Beck has been preaching all along:

What is even more amazing is that Beck's own website has the very same feature where random individual contributors can post their own content, which carries a similar disclaimer:

TheBlaze contributor channel supports an open discourse on a range of views. The opinions expressed in this channel are solely those of each individual author.

In fact, anti-gay activist Matt Barber regularly posts his columns on Beck's contributor network meaning, if we were to operate by Beck's logic, that we could attribute Barber's bigoted anti-gay views to Beck and his The Blaze website.

If we were to attribute to Beck and The Blaze the views of random contributors on his website, he'd laugh in our face ... and rightly so. But that won't stop him from cluelessly doing the very same thing on every program on his network.

Beck: God Told Me To Sit Down And Shut Up Because He Has 'Absolute Miracles' In Store For The Blaze

On his radio broadcast today, Glenn Beck delivered a cryptic message to this listeners, hinting that God has some pretty big plans in store for his The Blaze network in the coming months.

Beck revealed that, last summer, he received an "extreme message" from God telling him to "shut up, sit down, zip your mouth" and stop asking questions and just "know that I am God" because that has The Blaze's future all mapped out.

And when it all comes to fruition in a few months, Beck said, we are going to see "miracles, absolute miracles":

Another Benghazi Conspiracy Theory Collapses: The David Petraeus Hero Narrative

When CIA director David Petraeus stepped down from his post after an extramarital affair went public, former general and right-wing activist Jerry Boykin confidently claimed that Petraeus resigned in order to expose an Obama administration scandal surrounding the Benghazi attack.

Boykin, now vice president of the Family Research Council, suggested in 2012 that Petraeus was “held hostage” by administration officials and resigned because “he reached a point where he was unwilling to continue spouting the party line [on Benghazi] to the American public and continuing to breach his own integrity.”

Glenn Beck, who regularly hosts Boykin on the Blaze network, suggested that Petraeus stepped down from the CIA in order to reveal information about the Benghazi attack that could bring down the Obama administration.

But, stunningly, nothing Boykin or Beck said about Petraeus came true. In fact, Petraeus recently cited former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s “extraordinarily resolute, determined and controlled” handling of the incident as a reason she would “make a tremendous president.”

“She’d make a tremendous president,” Petraeus says in the new book “HRC” by Jonathan Allen and Aimee Parnes.

And for Petraeus, Exhibit A in why she would be a tremendous president is the very thing for which Republicans most aggressively attack Clinton: her performance as Secretary of State when the U.S. consulate in Benghazi, Libya, was attacked.

“Like a lot of great leaders, her most impressive qualities were most visible during tough times,” Petraeus tells Allen and Parnes. “In the wake of the Benghazi attacks, for example, she was extraordinarily resolute, determined, and controlled.”

Petraeus was director of the Central Intelligence Agency at the time of the attacks, which killed four Americans, including two who worked for the CIA and the U.S. ambassador to Libya, Chris Stevens.

As Kyle pointed out, the GOP-led House Armed Services Committee released a report today that thoroughly debunks the conservative conspiracy theories surrounding the Benghazi faux-scandal.

This is more bad news for Boykin, who predicted that the House would uncover a massive scandal and pressed Speaker Boehner into launching additional investigations. With his conspiracy theory unraveling, Boykin is even implicating Boehner in the Benghazi “cover-up” since the House investigations have failed to discover the “scandal” he is trying to find.

But don’t expect conservative pundits like Beck and Boykin to reconsider or retract any of their outrageous and delusional Benghazi claims that don’t hold any merit outside of the right-wing echo chamber.

The Blaze Debunks Glenn Beck Yet Again

Today, Glenn Beck's website, The Blaze, reported that the Republican-led House Armed Services Committee is set to release a report on the 2012 attack in Benghazi that concludes that the military was never ordered to "stand down" during the attack and refrain from attempting to help Ambassador Christopher Stevens and the others who were killed in the attack: 

A House committee formally concluded for the first time that there was no military “stand down” order given on the night of the deadly terror attacks in Benghazi, Libya.

It’s a finding that one committee aide acknowledged to TheBlaze, “some people are going to be upset about.” The allegation that the military was told to stand down on aiding the Americans in Benghazi has long been used to accuse the Obama administration of not doing enough to save the lives of U.S. Ambassador Christopher Stevens and others during the Sept. 11, 2012 attacks.

The Republican-led House Armed Services Committee, however, concluded in its new report that no such order was given; rather, Army Lt. Col. S.E. Gibson, then-head of the site security team at the U.S. Embassy in Tripoli, was ordered by higher commanders to remain in Tripoli, lest another attack take place there as part of a larger coordinated assault.

“The term ‘stand down’ means different things to different people. To someone in uniform, it means you are to do nothing … that is not the direction that Lt. Col. Gibson was given,” the committee aide told TheBlaze.

Among those who are probably "going to be upset" about this finding is none other than Glenn Beck himself, who has spent over a year repeatedly accusing President Obama of refusing to help those at the compound and intentionally letting them die, weeping on camera that such callous indifference on the part of the President means that "today officially is the day that I no longer recognize my country":

We'd also like to point out that, during one of his previous Benghazi rants, Beck declared that anyone who would repeat demonstrably false statements regardless of that facts about a situation like this is a pathological liar with "deep psychological problems."

Right Wing Leftovers - 2/10/14

  • Glenn Beck didn't actually see the opening ceremony at the Olympics, but he still didn't like it.
  • While many of his allies on the Right have begun to praise Vladimir Putin, Cliff Kincaid is refusing to buy into it.
  • Those participating in the American Heritage Girls, the right-wing version of the Girl Scouts, will soon be able to earn a "Respect Life Patch that reinforces the organization's commitment to honoring life from conception to natural death."
  • NOM approves of Dumb Starbucks.
  • The Right's continued attempt to paint proposed restrictions on 501Cc4 organizations as an attack on conservative groups is truly mind-boggling.
  • Finally, this forthcoming Christian movie in which an college freshman teaches his atheist philosophy professor that "God's Not Dead" looks to be just as good as one would expect from a movie with such a plot.

Beck Reviews 'The Monuments Men' By Blaming 'Progressives' For The Holocaust

Glenn Beck watched the film "The Monuments Men" over the weekend and he seemed to like it ... but it was sort of hard to tell because the segment he spent reviewing it today on his radio program consisted primarily of him blaming "progressives" for the Holocaust.

Beck said the film made his blood boil because it never discussed the fact that President Franklin Roosevelt cared about saving works of art but made no effort to stop the Nazis from murdering millions of Jews because he, like progressives then and now, "are all anti-Jewish."

"Forget about the art," Beck bellowed. "What about the people? What happened to be the people? No, we didn't care. We didn't care.  Progressives didn't care and so all of those Jews died. We could have stopped them.  Instead of Monuments Men, how about Auschwitx Men, how about Dachau Men? Why didn't we do that? Because they didn't care ... They were all anti-Jewish, just as much as they're anti-Jewish now":

Paranoia-Rama: Satan's Grammys, Obama's Internment Camps, & Lego's Anti-Business Brainwashing

RWW’s Paranoia-Rama takes a look at five of the week’s most absurd conspiracy theories from the Right.

Children are our future, and our friends at Fox News warn us that “The Lego Movie” is trying to brainwash them into becoming mini-Marxists.

Maybe these communist kids will then take part in President Obama’s plan, revealed to us by Glenn Beck, to round up his enemies and force them into internment camps? We’re not saying for sure, just asking the question!

5. Legos Out To Destroy Capitalism

Fox Business Network is worried that “The Lego Movie,” “The Muppets” and “RoboCop” are attempting to “indoctrinate kids” with “anti-capitalist messages” … just like “It’s A Wonderful Life.”

Host Monica Crowley even cheered on It’s a Wonderful Life villain Mr. Potter, which makes this Jimmy Kimmel sketch seem all too real.

4. 'Al Franken Wants To Require Pedophilia In All Public Schools'

In an absurd — even for him — email to members of his Pray In Jesus Name Project, right-wing activist Gordon Klingenschmitt insists that Sen. Al Franken’s Student Non-Discrimination Act will “require pedophilia in all public schools” and “require pro-gay child recruiting.”

But don’t worry, Klingenschmitt says he can stop Franken’s “‘No Child Left Unmolested’ amendment” through faxes (and your financial contribution): “Do you want Al Franken legislating pedophiles to recruit your kids? Let's petition all 535 Congressmen and Senators to STOP Franken's child-abuse.”

3. Satan’s Grammys

Leave it to Religious Right radio host Kevin Swanson to explain how the 2014 Grammy Awards transformed into a “satanic pagan orgy” that celebrated “fornication, twerking, stripping and satanic rituals.”

Of course, Swanson explains, the music industry’s “demonic approach to things” really traces back to The Beatles.

2. Antichrist 2016

Far-right pundits are still debating whether President Obama is the Antichrist or merely setting the stage for the Antichrist, but at least one Republican congressional candidate believes he has identified the Antichrist’s identity: Hillary Clinton.

Ryan Zinke, a Montana GOP state senator who is running for an open U.S. House seat, called Clinton the Antichrist during a campaign speech, which ended with him “handing out 50-calibre bullets to each of the four men who sponsored the event before a crowd of about 30 people.”

The Republican politician later backtracked when his remarks generated national headlines, saying that he was only joking and that he regretted that his comments were “a little bit harsh.”

1. Internment Camps A-Coming

Glenn Beck floated the FEMA camps conspiracy theory in 2009 before he eventually renounced it, but that doesn’t mean he stopped thinking that President Obama or his allies are planning to establish internment camps as part of a burgeoning police state.

Just this week, Beck suggested that the government may begin to round up Obamacare critics, abortion rights opponents and climate change deniers. He even unveiled a new claim about how the Obama administration may cause another war against Israel in order to force Jewish Americans and supporters of Israel into camps.

Beck: 'Technology Is Authoritarian Porn'

Glenn Beck's incessant fear of technology is well-established, as every technological advance is seen by Beck as one step further down the road toward our inevitable dystopian nightmare. And this terror about what developing technology might do to us in the future was the theme of last night's monologue on Beck's television program, where he warned that "technology is authoritarian porn."

In particular, Beck was a bit alarmed by reports that the late Philip Seymour Hoffman would be digitally recreated in order to complete a key scene in The Hunger Games film he was working on when he died.

"There is no death," Beck said. "Is it not a little disturbing?"

"The transition is happening at a rapid pace," Beck warned, and doing so at a time when Americans are becoming dumber while the government is growing larger and more controlling.

"You, your children, and your grandchildren will be at their mercy," Beck warned. "Wake up! Wake up!":

Beck Ties Together The White House, The Boycott Of Israel, And The Coming Internment Of Jews

On his radio broadcast yesterday, Glenn Beck warned that conservatives who don't believe in climate change or abortion rights or support Obamacare might soon be rounded up and forced into internment camps. This was a theme he returned to on his television program last night, stepping it up a notch by delivering a typically Beckian lesson, complete with chalkboard, on how the effort to boycott Israel is being orchestrated directly from the White House and will result in Jews in America being forced into internment camps.

The way Beck sees it, the movement to boycott Israel is being run by the Obama Administration in order to pressure Israel into making concessions in the name of peace which, when Israel refuses, will justify the next violent Palestinian uprising. Once that breaks out, then all the groups responsible for the boycott in the first place - including Oxfam, George Soros, the Tides Foundation, Samantha Power, Teresa Heinz Kerry, and the White House - will call for an international military force to invade Israel and enforce peace under the Responsibility to Protect doctrine.

And when that happens, Jews and supporters of Israel in America who oppose such military action will be rounded up and forced into internment camps.

At least that is the best explanation that we can come up with because, like all of Beck's conspiracy theories, this one is so flimsy and convoluted and illogical that it defies comprehension.

If you want to watch Beck spend nearly fifteen minutes laying this all out, you can do so here

Or you can just watch our video of Beck attempting to explain his bizarre theory to his bored-looking staff during his morning meeting:

Beck Warns Those Who Don't Believe In Global Warming Or Abortion Rights Might Wind Up In Internment Camps

Glenn Beck delivered another one of his incoherent, stream-of-consciousness lessons on today's radio program, inspired by Justice Antonin Scalia's recent statement that, in a time of war, it was entirely possible that the Supreme Court would allow the government to set up internment camps for those perceived to be enemies of the nation.

This, of course, is exactly the sort of thing that Beck has been warning about for years, so he seized on Scalia's statement in order to deliver some bizarre rebuke to President Obama for supposedly being responsible for the biggest "missed opportunity in all of world history" by not being like Jesus when he was elected and uniting the entire country, and instead choosing to be evil and punish his enemies.

We genuinely have no idea what Beck is talking about, but according to him, America is headed down a course to where people who do not believe in climate change or support abortion rights or Obamacare will soon be rounded up and tossed into prison camps.

"It was a group of people who said 'we know we're right,'" Beck said. "Global warming; sound familiar? We know we're right and if you're standing in the way, you're standing in the way of Manifest Destiny. Sound familiar; Obamacare? We know we right and if you don't, you're standing in the way of progress. Sound familiar? Sound like abortion advocates? We know we right and if you don't agree with us, there's no place for you in this state. That's why Scalia is saying it's going to happen again":

Glenn Beck Gets Into Character To Demonstrate ... Something

Glenn Beck has spent several segments on his radio show mocking other networks for their embarrassingly bad bit in which program hosts dress up and attempt to produce humorous skits in an effort to dramatize an issue or explain a point.

Obviously, when other people do it, it is painful and excruciating to watch and the results are inevitably stupid and not at all funny, but when Beck does it, it is brilliant ... which is why, last night, he transformed his television program into a black and white film noir spoof so that he could explain why the proposed MyRA savings plan is no different than playing a slot machine by telling some confusing story about a down-on-his luck chump named Lucky and a legless prostitute named Charlie:

As we noted the other day, at this point Beck's radio and television programs are becoming nothing more than displays of his own hypocrisy, as he mocks, attacks, and criticizes others for doing the exact things he does on a regular basis.

Beck: Coke's Super Bowl Ad Was An 'In Your Face' Effort To 'Divide People'

Glenn Beck was pleasantly surprised by last night's Super Bowl because he didn't witness anything that upset or offended him except, of course, for the Coca-Cola commercial featuring a rendition of "America The Beautiful" sung in various languages.

That ad, Beck declared on his radio program today, was "an in your face" effort "to divide people."

The entire point of the ad was, according to Beck, to send the message that "if you don't like it, if you're offended by it, then you're a racist ... That's all this is, is to divide people":

Beck: 'This Was The State Of The Union Where Our President Declared He Would Become America's First Dictator'

As everyone knows, Glenn Beck is a reasonable and rational man who is not at all prone to hyperbole or wholesale emotional breakdowns, which is why it was so surprising to learn that he did not very much like President Obama's State of the Union Address last night, calling it "horrific from start to finish" and declaring that it is the speech that future historians will look back upon as the moment Obama seized control and declared himself to be a dictator.

"Over and over again," Beck said, "looking us in the eye, he said he would use his executive power to get his way. He bragged about it!" As such, Beck urged his audience to note this day in their diaries so that future generations will know the true history, which is that "this was the State of the Union where our president declared he would become America's first dictator":

Beck: Katy Perry's Grammy Performance Was 'Full-Fledged Witchcraft And Demonic Glorification'

Glenn Beck was deeply disturbed by Sunday night's Grammy Awards show, but not for the reason all the other Religious Right activists are outraged. In Beck's case, he was upset by Katy Perry's "Dark Horse" performance, which was unmistakably "demonic."

Calling the performance "full-fledged witchcraft and demonic glorification," Beck said Perry's performance is further proof that American society is worshiping a false, demonic god ... "and it's not going to end well":

Beck: Criticism Of Tom Perkins Proves 'The Socialist Revolution Is Here'

It has been a while since Glenn Beck dedicated his opening monologue to misrepresenting disparate global events in order to weave together an incoherent explanation of just how America has turned into a tyrannical communist/fascist/Nazi dictatorship.

But that was his message again last night, spurred on by his outrage over the fact that people were offended by a letter to the editor published in the Wall Street Journal in which billionaire venture capitalist Tom Perkins compared the "progressive war on the American one percent" to the demonization of the Jews during the Holocaust.

Perkins has since apologized and Beck is outraged over the fact that Perkins has been "savagely beaten in public" for simply telling the truth.

"We are Germany 1930," Beck said. "You can deny it all you want, but the socialist revolution is here," As proof, Beck pointed to the fact that Perkins' company, Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers, sent out a tweet distancing itself from his comments:

Tom Perkins has not been involved in KPCB in years. We were shocked by his views expressed today in the WSJ and do not agree.

That tweet is, for Beck, proof that Perkins is being ostracized just as the Jews were under the Nazi regime.

"Is this a healthy society that says this?" Beck asked, before reading the tweet. "Welcome to the brave new world, gang":

Right Wing Round-Up - 1/24/14

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